Forget to eat?

I wish I was a busy mother who forgets to eat.
I sometimes wish I was a little bit like my lean-cyclist husband who doesn’t enjoy stopping his day to eat. He isn’t a foodie.He will eat whatever I put in front of him. On a trip he doesn’t want to take the time to go sit in a restaurant but it is a treat for me. At home he doesn’t want to take the time to prepare, shop, cook because that means he has to clean up again.
I wish I was like my high-metabolism mama, slender and calm, mother of eight.
I have been so busy at work but I still get snacky in the afternoon. Some of my coworkers are so busy that they don’t get a real lunch hour where they get time to eat(they will bring a light snack and they will take a quick break but they don’t always get a real hot or fresh meal).
I almost wish I could live off juices and smoothies, but I know I can’t.
There are times when I wish I needed something drastic like a surgery or something that changes my sensitive taste buds and sniffer senses so that I wouldn’t enjoy textures, smells, and salty-sweet tastes so so much.
I desire all the Trader Joe’s deliciousness and all things pumpkin. I love bread and gluten even thought I later feel bloated and huge after. I enjoy rice, beans, kale, quinoa, salad, and vegetables. But I still make room for potatoes. I try a tiny spoonful of everything at a potluck, but still feel big. I used to think my eyes are bigger than my stomach, but I also am known for cleaning my plate, not wasting, and trying to remember to set aside leftovers and being okay with that. I can portion control but I conveniently forget to. I say that I hate HFCS and GMO processed foods but I still can eat a couple Cheetos or macncheese like any other American gal.
I want to be minimalist and self controlled and wise. Yet I am known for being loud, overdramatic, easily excited, and quite the extremist. I want to take my time eating like the French, but I grab and go, walking or reading.
I have a lot of nice clothes, shoes, makeup, jewelry, and beauty products. I’m always rushing to and from the gym, to and from work, then in my pjs. I really am a tshirt and jeans, with a ponytail when it comes down to it. I love the classic 1940s look but can’t imitate it. My hair doesn’t hold curl either. I would like to look like one of those model pin ups, but that takes time.
Maybe I’ve gotten too comfortable, secure in my husband’s love, confident in Christ, and happy taking care of myself, that I’ve gotten so lazy!? (from my old depression days where I didn’t take care of myself. My hair was ratty and I wore baggy clothes to hide my fat. I tore my nails and cuticles till they became infected. I overate comfort food and drank in order to be able to sleep. I even dabbled in self mutilation and had panic attacks).
This is me, being honest. I love my Reliv, but I also like chips.:) Maintaining is hard work. I wish I didn’t love everything and have so many favorites!

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